SCENE  1.  int. – c.m.a.c. Signal office - morning

Lt. Callaghan enters and is immediately set upon by maj. dingby.

Maj. Dingby:

Lieutenant Callaghan. Where have you been?

Lt. Callaghan:

Working in the Radio Room, Sir.

maj. Dingby:

You know that I have been trying to brief you and Captain Dennison regarding your Saigon Area inspection duties.

Lt. Callaghan:

I’m sorry Sir, I have been very busy. Should we arrange a time to meet?

Maj. Dingby:

This situation is becoming intolerable. It seems that one or the other of you is always missing. I want you to sit down right now while I contact Captain Dennison and have him come over here. I will give you both the briefing as soon as he arrives and that will be the start of your duty.

Maj. Dingby telephones Captain Dennison

This is Major Dingby. Is Captain Dennison in his cave? (pause) I see, and when will he be back? Not until 1500 hours. Well you tell him that I want him in my office as soon as he arrives. Thank you.

Lt. Callaghan:

He’s gone to 6^th ARVN, across the river Sir,

Maj. Dingby:

Why didn’t you tell me that before Lieutenant?

Lt. Callaghan:

You didn’t give me a chance Sir.

Maj. Dingby:

I guess you’re off the hook until 1500 hours when he arrives. I want you both in my office then. No excuse will cover your absence. Is that clear Lieutenant?

Lt, Callaghan:

Yes, Sir.

Lt. callaghan gets up and quickly exits the signal office.

SCENE  2. int. C.m.a.c. Engineering office - morning

Lt. Callaghan is called into the Engineering office as he passes

Maj. Ainsworthy:

Lieutenant Callaghan, just the man I want to see. I understand that you and Captain Dennison are the new additions to bridge inspection duty. Welcome aboard.

Lt. Callaghan:

Major Dingby hasn’t yet briefed us. However, I understand that is the case. What can I do for you Sir?

Maj. Ainsworthy:

We have a little job for you while you are inspecting the bridges. You may or may not know that the Engineering Colonel has convinced the General that the addition of a pair of geese on each of the main bridges would enhance security.

Lt. Callaghan:

I heard a rumour Sir. However, I discarded it in light of how the General reacted to the monkey and chickens being added to his SCIF compound.

Maj. Ainsworthy: 

Well I can tell you it is for real and you will be inspecting the bridges over the next several weeks to which we will be deploying geese. We need you to check on the geese and make sure they are being taken care of properly. Will you help us?

Lt. callaghan: 

That should not be a problem Sir. Just tell Captain Dennison and I what needs to be done.

maj. Ainsworthy hands Lt. Callaghan a thick manual

Maj. Ainsworthy:

Here is the first draft of the Standard Operating Procedure for the care and feeding of the geese. We’ve spent a lot of time in its compilation. Study it so you will know what should be expected and report to us if there are any problems.

Paging through the manual

Lt. Callaghan:

Yes Sir. Do you have a copy for Captain Dennison?

Maj. Ainsworthy:

No Lieutenant. As you can see these are expensive documents so you’ll have to share it with Captain Dennison.

Lt. Callaghan:

Thank you Sir. Well, I’ll be on my way.

SCENE  3. Int. - C.M.A.C. Radio Room – Mid Day

Lt. Callaghan Enters

SFC. Holstein:

How was your meeting with Major Ainsworthy Sir?

Lt. Callaghan:

How did you know about that?

SFC. Holstein:

Specialist Dudley passed the Engineering Office just when you were being given that manual.

Lt. Callaghan:

Here, look at it. Can you believe what they have done? The title says it all, but I think it should be renamed goose duty.

SFC. Holstein:

‘The Care and Feeding of Sentry Geese’, sixty pages including pictures and illustrations.

Lt. Callaghan:

Captain Dennison and I are supposed to commit it to memory so we can check on how well the geese are being taken care of at the bridges. We only have a two-page checklist for the inspection of the bridge. Something is way out of kilter here. In any case, I had better start reviewing.

Lt. Callaghan sits in his chair, opens the manual on his desk and starts reading.

SCENE  4. INT. – c.m.a.c. Signal Office – Mid Afternoon

Lt. Callaghan enters

Lt. Callaghan:

Captain Dennison Sir, long time no see. How was 6^th ARVN?

Capt. Dennison:

Like being sent to the Eastern Front. Those guys have a no win situation out there. They get beat up for letting rockets come into the city from an area they don’t have enough men to cover. What help they get from Riverine Forces varies with the tides.

Lt. Callaghan:

Anything new regarding the effects of the tides?

CaPt. Dennison:

A couple of things. The North Vietnamese have a simple actuator that they put on poles in the water. The bottom plate floats and the top is fixed. Therefore, when the bottom plate floats up with the tide, it completes the firing circuit on the top plate and the 122 mm rocket is launched. There is never anyone around when it happens so counter fire is useless. The other problem with the tides is when a Riverine craft is caught up stream. Either it gets stuck when the tide goes out or it gets into trouble and can’t make it down stream at high tide because bridges block the way. There have been a number of bridges blown away by our own troops. We just blame those on the NVA.

Major Dingby Enters the Signal Office

Maj. Dingby:

Well gentlemen we’re finally in one place. May we conduct the Bridge Inspection briefing now or do you have engagements that are more pressing?

Lt. Callaghan:  

Sir, I do have something I need to attend to that’s rather important.

Maj. Dingby:

And what might that be Lieutenant?

Lt. Callaghan:

I broke a nail this afternoon and I need to find a nail file.

Capt. Dennison starts laughing

Maj. Dingby:

Captain, I don’t see what’s so funny and as for you Lieutenant, you’re already on thin ice so watch the wise cracks. Okay you two, cut the crap and get over here.

Maj. Dingby walks to the Saigon area operations map on the wall.

Each one of these pins represents an inspection point. We, meaning you two, as I will be coordinating from here, are to visit each of these installations at least once a month.

Lt. Callaghan:

That’s a few more installations than bridges Sir.

Maj. Dingby:

That’s right Lieutenant they include not only the major and minor bridges but all the District, US and ARVN Unit Headquarters as well as installations that are part of the Emergency Response Network like the US Embassy, AFVN, etc.

Lt. Callaghan:

How do I tie this in with Duck Bunker duty Sir?

Maj. Dingby:

With the additional animals in the Duck Bunker, the General feels they will provide sufficient security and has dropped the inspection requirements to every other night. That means you will have enough time for bridge inspections at night.

Lt. Callaghan:

Oh, thank you Sir. I was getting worried that I might end up with a free night.

Maj. Dingby:

Cut the crap Lieutenant.

Maj. Dingby Hands each of them  a folder full of SOPs.

These are the Standard Operating Instructions for the inspections. You are to complete one report per visit. You will find the schedule on the top of the pile with your assignments. Lieutenant, your first assignment is tomorrow night so you have a night off. Any questions?

Lt. Callaghan:

I haven’t shown this to Captain Dennison yet but I was given this SOP by Engineering. It’s for the sentry geese on the bridges. They want us to report on the condition of the geese along with bridge security in general. I’ve code named it ‘Goose Duty’ so as to not confuse it with ‘Duck Duty’

Maj. Dingby:

Don’t be a wise ass Lieutenant. Where did you get this? Engineering never cleared it through me. Give me that.

Lt. Callaghan hands Maj. Dingby the Sentry Geese SOP. Maj. Dingby pages through it.

This looks a bit over the top for a couple of geese. I suppose we have to help them. Read it and see if you can make it any simpler.

Clerk:

Lieutenant Callahan, you have a phone call.

Lt. Callaghan:

This is Lieutenant Callaghan.

Lt. Steele:

Callaghan, how about a drink tonight. I’ll pick you up at 1900 hours at the Nhan Vi. We’ll go over to the Explosive Ordinance Villa. Tonight is their Blue Movie night.

Lt. Callaghan:

Sounds good to me. What’s a Blue Movie night?

Lt. Steele: (O.O.V)

I’ll explain in the jeep. Have to run. See you at 1900 hours.

Maj. Dingby:

You’re not getting involved with Blue Movies are you Lieutenant? The Criminal Investigation Division (CID) takes a dim view of that.

Lt. Callaghan:

Oh no Sir. I was corrected, they are ‘True’ movies.

Maj. dingby:

Well, that’s better. I wouldn’t want you besmirching the good name of the Signal Section. You know that we pride ourselves on our good name, unlike some of the other sections in C.M.A.C. Headquarters.

Lt. Callaghan:

I’ll keep that in mind in all that I do Sir. It’s good to know we have a good name to protect. (pause) I do however need to get back to the Radio Room and sort through all this paperwork. So, if you have completed your briefing I will go and study.

Maj. Dingby:

You do that Lieutenant and do let me know what the ‘True’ movie is about. I love ‘True’ movies. I watch them whenever I can.

Lt. Callaghan and captain Dennison quickly leave the Signal Office. On the way OUT, they speak quietly.

Capt. Dennison:

What’s all this crap about ‘True’ movies Lieutenant?

Lt. Callaghan:

I had to come up with some story otherwise Dingby would be all over me. Now I just have to come up with the name of a film. Maybe I’ll tell him the projector broke and leave it at that.

Capt. Dennison:

You mean you’re not going to the Radio Room to study?

Lt. Callaghan:

Hell no! My only night off for weeks? No way, I’m blowing this place! See you tomorrow, Sir.

SCENE  5. Ext. Explosive ORDINANCE Disposal (EOD) Villa - Night

Lts. Steele and Callaghan enter drive through EOD villa gate and park the jeep. Several soldiers sifting through some material. Commanding Officer greets them.

Lt. hanes:

Steele, I haven’t seen you for a while. How have you been?

Lt. Steele:

This is Lieutenant Callaghan from C.M.A.C., Lieutenant Hanes.

Lt. Callaghan:

Nice to meet you. (pause) What are these guys doing?

Lt. Hanes:

Sifting through 400 pounds of shaved dynamite to see if there are any more detonators. We picked up the crate outside the COFAT yesterday. Someone had set off a small explosion just outside the canteen. That killed ten people and injured forty more, mostly from flying glass.

Lt. callaghan:

What is this then?

Lt. Hanes:

What happens is they set off a small charge but big enough to make people think that was the extent of it. Then they have a bigger charge, like this one, with delayed fusing to go off when the crowd gathers to help the wounded and generally rubberneck. We were lucky with this one. The fuse was defective. Otherwise, it would have ripped up half the block. By the way, how do you know Steele?

Lt. Callaghan:

We first met at Fort Dix reception station and with six other guys stayed together until we were broken up for Nam. We were originally part of ‘Toon Twelbe, the name was coined by Drill Instructor Sergeant Walker who had a little trouble with his pronunciation.

Lt. hanes:

Well, welcome to our humble abode. Come on in and have a drink.

Lt. callaghan:

Nice place. How do you guys rate?

Lt. Hanes:

It was a present from the Ambassador after we helped him through TET of ‘68. Let’s say we cleared the path that kept him alive. He’s been grateful ever since. Trouble is in this town it doesn’t take long for all the wrong people to find out where you live, hence the security. It puts a strain on the neighbors but they know where to come if there is trouble.

Lt. Callaghan:

Is this your first time over?

Lt. Hanes:

This is my third term. Unlike my predecessors, I have managed to make it through the last two without cracking up. At least I think I have.

Soldier:

Lieutenant Hanes, there’s a suspected bomb at USAID.

Lt. Hanes:

I have to run. The bar is over there. Just feed the kitty for the beer. The movies are free tonight, thanks to the CID.

SCENE 6. int. – EOD Villa, bar - Night

Lt. Callaghan wanders into the bar and meets up with Lt. Steele, Lt. hanes returns, films running in the background

Lt. Hanes:

Sorry about that, it was a false alarm. We get a lot of those. I’ll buy you a cool one. The skinflcks they are running are from the latest CID postal raid. They are bad, copies of copies of originals made in the thirties and forties. The suppliers in the States get their money up front so they don’t care if they arrive or not. 

Lt. Steele:

Imagine how upset you would be if you paid for something like this? Oh well, it’s just as well they are being adequately policed otherwise we wouldn’t have our little diversion.

Lt. hanes:

How about a tour of the villa?

Lt. Steele:

You never asked me if I wanted to go on a tour before.

Lt. Hanes:

You never asked. Besides, you’re always too busy with your honeys.

Lt. Steele:

I can’t help the fact that they love me. I would be remiss if I wasn’t kind to them. You’re striking a harsh blow at a very tender area of my life.

Alarm sounds in the background. Lt. Hanes DISAPPEARS

The balloon has gone up again. Look at Hanes; he’s like a firehouse dog. He has a tough time missing a call to duty. Just can’t help himself.

The film ends, unrolling in to a pile on the floor. Lt. Callaghan watches it and turns to get another beer. turns to the person next to him at the bar

Bill Fisher:

Someone will clean it, they always do. Where are you from Lieutenant?

Lt. Callaghan:

Lieutenant Callaghan from San Francisco, California.

Bill Fisher:

I’m Bill Fisher, Embassy Security. You know I had a great time in San Francisco working with a guy from the Police Force Hotel Detail. Funniest guy you’d ever meet. He used to call me ‘Green Pee’ as a result of drinking green beer at Harrington’s on Saint Patrick’s Day.

Lt. Callaghan:

The guy sounds like a real character. I have some relatives in the SFPD. What was his name?

Bill Fisher:

‘Babe’ Healy, ever met him?

Lt. callaghan:

Met him? He’s my cousin.

Explosion rocks the building

Bill Fisher:

What was that? Grab your beer and get on the floor until they call the all clear.

a few minutes later an EOD soldier comes into the bar area

EOD Soldier:

It’s all clear. Someone tried to blow us up and missed. We’ll have to clear the place. Just be careful when you are leaving, and don’t forget the kitty!

Lt. Callaghan

It’s bewitching hour anyway. I have to get back to the BOQ and get some sleep. I have Duck Bunker duty tonight.

Bill Fisher:

Lieutenant Callaghan, here’s my card. Give me a call.  We’ll have a couple of drinks and talk about Babe.

Lt. Steele:

Let’s get going I have to drop you off and get to my honey’s place before curfew. I wish you lived closer.

Lt. Callaghan:

So do I.

SCENE  7. Int. c.m.a.c. Signal; Office - Morning

LT. Callaghan enter, Maj. Dingby stands and starts walking to Lt. Col. Grimes office

Maj. Dingby:

Good morning Lieutenant, I expect you are ready with your Duck Bunker report.

Lt. Callaghan approaches Lt. Col. Grimes desk and salutes.

Lt. Callaghan:

Sir, security at 0300 hours was tight. No security breaches to report.

Lt. Col Grimes:

Things we like to hear Lieutenant. It’s a rare day that you stand before me without a problem to report. Mark this on the calendar Major. 

Looks at a piece of paper

You are scheduled to inspect the bridge on the Phu Lam road tonight and the Bin Dinh bridge on Friday with some one from engineering. Are you prepared for these inspections?

Lt. callaghan:

Yes Sir. However, I have one question Sir. I understand the Phu Lam bridge is on a Red Road that could be held by the enemy at any time. Will I have security?

Lt. Col. Grimes:

That’s an old designation Lieutenant. That area has been secure for a while. You shouldn’t need any security.

Lt. Callaghan:

I am sure my trusty M14 semi automatic will get me through any trouble Sir. However, maybe I should bring my Kalashnikov AK-47 automatic just in case.

Lt. Col Grimes:

Where did you get an AK-47 Lieutenant?

Lt. callaghan:

Bought it from one of the guys going back when you told me I was assigned to bridge duty Sir. The M14 won’t help me much in a firefight, not when the other side is using AK-47s.

Lt. Col. Grimes:

Okay, but I don’t want to hear about you getting into trouble carrying an unauthorised weapon. Now get out of here before I find something else for you to do.

SCENE  8. ext. front of Nhan vi BOQ – Mid night

Cpl. Rosenburg screeches to a halt in his jeep. Lt. Callaghan jumps in, and they depart in the same manner.

Cpl. Rosenburg:

We’re off Sir.

Lt. Callaghan:

So I noticed Corporal. Any chance of getting some coffee?

Cpl. Rosenburg:

Are you kidding Sir, at this time of night? No way!

SCENE  9. Ext, - Checkpoints - midnight

They approach the first checkpoint and cpl. Rosenburg steps on the ACCELERATOR

Let’s see if they will open up or we have to stop?

They just slip under the BARRIER as they pass. Lt. Callaghan ducks instinctively.

This is great! Just like you see in the old war movies.

Lt. Callaghan:

Do you watch a lot of old war movies Corporal?

CPL. Rosenburg:

Yes, Sir. All the time. It’s funny how some of them are like this one.

Second barrier appears, same routine

Lt. Callaghan:

I’m not surprised. You know Rosenburg someday you’re going to misjudge one of those barriers and we’ll be decapitated.

cpl. Rosenburg:

It will never happen Sir, I’m too good at this.

cpl. Rosenburg screeches to a halt within inches of the Frontier barrier.

MP3:

Papers?

Lt. Callaghan:

Papers, what papers?

cpl. Rosenburg:

I have them Sir. Major Dingby gave them to me just in case we needed them. They’re orders to clear us through the city. Otherwise they wouldn’t let us access a road with a Red status.

Lt. Callaghan:

That’s cute. Major Dingby never told me about them.

cpl. Rosenburg:

They rarely ask for them until you reach a frontier checkpoint. Sometimes they don’t ask for them at all going out of the city. They must figure that is you’re stupid enough to do something like this then go ahead. From here on Sir, we’re on our own.

SCENE  10. Ext. – Phu Lam road, south of the city – midnight:

cpl. rosenburg picks up speed

The bridge is not far and they know we are coming so we shouldn’t get shot by friendly, and I use the term loosely, forces. I hope.

Lt. Callaghan:

What do you mean you hope, Corporal?

Cpl. Rosenburg:

Sometimes they make mistakes. You know, you read about in the Stars and Stripes. Accidents happen. Don’t you worry about it Sir, just sit back and get a little sleep. I’ll wake you when we get there.

Lt. Callaghan:

Sleep? Who the hell can sleep with that kind of introduction?

Cpl. Rosenburg:

Don’t worry Sir, I’ve been here during the day. It’s a little bridge near a pumping station and well lit. The site is really of little value to either side, it’s really nothing more than a checkpoint on the road to Phu Lam.

SCENE  11. ext. – Phu lam road checkpoint – after midnight

cpl. Rosenburg screeches to a halt. the lights of Phu lam communications station are in the distance.

Lt. callaghan:

Where the hell are the security lights for the checkpoint?

Cpl. Rosenburg:

I guess I was wrong Sir. The lights must be out tonight.

Lt. Callaghan:

Why do you think they may be out? Are you sure we are in the right place? I don’t want to be inspecting the wrong spot in the road. Where exactly is the bridge Corporal?

cpl. Rosenburg:

We’re on it Sir.

Lt. Callaghan steps from the jeep into the dark and thin air. Falls past the bridge into the soft mud bank below and tumbles into the remains of a small Stream, shouts.

Lt. Callaghan:

Rosenburg! There is no God Damn bridge! Find something haul me up so I can get the hell out of here.

cpl. Rosenburg gets out a flashlight, flashes on Lt. callaghan and looks around.

cpl. Rosenburg:

You okay Sir?

Lt. Callaghan:

No, I’m not okay. I’m covered with slimy mud and can hardly stand up. Find me a rope or something and don’t hit me with it.

Cpl. Rosenburg:

The security lights have been blown away and the pumping station hit. Looks pretty bad up here. There are two bodies but no wounded. It looks like it may have been a mortar attack.

Lt. Callaghan:

All the more reason to get my ass up there and the two of us out of here.

cpl. Rosenburg throws Lt. callaghan a rusty cable and ties the other end to the jeep.

Cpl. Rosenburg:

Try that Sir. In the mean time, I am going to turn off the lights. If they are out there, they will have a bead on us by now. Better hurry up Sir.

Lt. Callaghan finally negotiates the bank and crawls up over the edge of the bridge. Once up Cpl. Rosenburg switches on the lights

You look like the creature from the Black Lagoon Sir.

Lt. callaghan:

Cut the crap Rosenburg. Get that cable off the jeep and get us out of here before something else happens.

SCENE  12. ext. – phu lam road, towards city – after midnight

cpl Rosenburg clears the cable, starts the jeep and spins around. They advance about 100 yards and the first mortar explodes behind them

Lt. callaghan:

Step on it Rosenburg they have locked in on us. We could be fragments in minutes if you can’t out run them.

CPL. Rosenburg lets out a cowboy yell and steps on the gas. Two more rounds follow. Lt. Callaghan tries to hold on but the slippery mud makes it difficult.

Cpl. Rosenburg:

We seem to be gaining Sir. The last one went off farther back than the previous one.

Lt. Callaghan:

Just keep pushing Rosenburg.

Cpl. Rosenburg makes a sharp right.

Cpl. rosenburg:

We’re back on the main road Sir. We should be a little safer. God you look like a mess Sir. Best thing to do is to hose you down as soon as possible.

SCENE 13. ext. phu lam road, frontier barrier – after midnight

cpl. Rosenburg screeches to a halt. Mp approaches and looks curiously at Lt. Callaghan.

MP3:

Is there someone in there?

Lt. Callaghan opens his eyes.

Lt. Callaghan:

Cut the crap soldier and let us through. I need to get cleaned up.

MP3:

Hey  guys, come over here. We’ve been invaded by the Swamp Man.  Corporal, don’t let that thing loose in the city.

cpl Rosenburg hands the guard the papers and he realises Callaghan is an officer. MP Salutes.

Sorry Sir, I thought you were one of us. Pass through.

SCENE  14. int. C.M.A.C. Tactical Operations Center (TOC) – early morning

Lt. Callaghan enters, Col. Peabody, TOC Duty Officer looks up.

Col. Peabody:

Who are you?

Lt. callaghan:

I’m Lieutenant Callaghan, the Radio Officer Sir. I’ve just returned from an attempted inspection of the Pumping Station Checkpoint on the Phu Lam road. They’ve been hit and my driver and I almost bit the dust as well.

Col. Peabody:

The report came in a few minutes ago. Flash towers had spotted the original attack but we couldn’t get in touch with you. I suggest you take a radio next time. By the way, what happened to you?

Lt. Callaghan:

I took a step on to the bridge that wasn’t and ended up in the swamp.

Col. Peabody:

The frontier checkpoint did radio in after you passed that a Swamp Man was entering the City. By now it’s all over the compound.

Lt. Callaghan:

Thanks Sir, I needed that. Do you need anymore information or am I dismissed?

Col. Peabody:

We have a team on their way out there now. I suggest that you find a hose and wash off before you return to your billets.

SCENE  15. int. – c.m.a.c. Signal Office - Morning

Lt. Callaghan enters and Maj. Dingby catches up with him.

Maj. Dingby:

Well if it isn’t the Swamp Man, another Callaghan Calamity. I must say Lieutenant Callaghan that without a doubt you can get into more trouble than anyone I know. I doubt that we can blame you for the attack but trouble does follow you. Lt. Col. Grimes is out this morning and since I already know what happened I won’t need a verbal report from you this morning but I will need a written report. This afternoon will be okay.

Lt. Callaghan:

Then I had better get moving Sir so I can complete all the needed reports on time.

SCENE  16. int. – c.m.a.c. radio room - morning

Lt. Callaghan enters

Sfc. Holstein:

Sir, you just received a call from Central Housing. It seems they have located a new BOQ room for you. They want you to call them to confirm.

Lt. callaghan:

That is good news. Did they say where it is?

SFC. Holstein:

The Meyerkord, on the boundary road of the Presidential Palace. It has its own shops, PX and cafeteria. Sounds like you might have a winner Sir. Oh, one other thing, you’ll have to move in today in order to secure it.

Lt. Callaghan:

Today, I can’t do it today, I have a ton of reports to submit.

sfc. Holstein:

I suppose I could do the reports for you Sir, but I’ll need tomorrow off to take care of some personal business.

Lt. Callaghan:

You’re a hard man Sergeant but I like you.

Grabs the phone and gives the operator the number

Central Housing, this is Lieutenant Callaghan. Do you have a new room assignment for me?

listens on the phone

Excellent, I’ll move in this afternoon. Thank you.

It is the Meyerkord Sergeant, now all I have to do is arrange transportation. I wonder if Corporal Rosenburg is free.

SFC. Holstein:

I don’t think he is free Sir. It will probably cost you three bottles of Martel Four Star Cognac. Shall I contact him?

Lt. Callaghan:

No thank you, I’ll do that Sergeant. Now all I have to do is find the facilitating commodity, that’s rare stuff in these parts. Although I think I saw some in the Meyerkord PX when I surveyed the place. I hope they haven’t sold out.

Lt. Callaghan picks up the phone and asks for the motor pool

Is Corporal Rosenburg there?

waits

Cpl. Rosenburg:

This is Corporal Rosenburg.

Lt. Callaghan:

This is Lieutenant Callaghan. I’ve rung up to pay off my debts. What do you drink?

CPL. Rosenburg:

I can’t believe my ears! Is this really Lieutenant Callaghan or a cruel joker?

Lt. callaghan:

Yes, it’s me Rosenburg. So, what do you drink?

CPL. Rosenburg:

Martel Four Star Cognac Sir.

Lt. Callaghan:

You can’t get that stuff in this country. Look, I’ll tell you what. If I get you a bottle are we clear?

cpl. Rosenburg:

Sure, but where are you going to get it Sir?

Lt. Callaghan:

I have my sources. Now, if I get you two bottles would you help me out in a big way this afternoon?

cpl. Rosenburg:

I knew it. I knew there was a catch. All right, what’s the deal?

Lt. Callaghan:

I need to go to Central Housing and then I need to move BOQs. Can you help me do it?

cpl. Rosenburg:

For three bottles, yes Sir.

Lt. Callaghan:

You drive a hard bargain Corporal. It’s a deal but you really screwed me to the wall. Somehow I’ll have to come up with the goods. Can we leave now? I can meet you out front.

cpl. Rosenburg:

Yes Sir, as luck would have it no one is around this afternoon anyway. They’ve all gone to the races. You probably could have gotten away with two bottles if you had bartered a little harder.

Lt. callaghan puts down the phone.

Lt. Callaghan:

Bastard, he knew he didn’t have anything else to do this afternoon anyway. (pause)  One more call. 716^th MP battalion, Radio officer. (pause) Steele this is Callaghan. You up to dinner at the Rex tonight, I have something to celebrate? (pause) See you in the bar at 1930 hours. Gotta go.

SCENE  17. ext. - Rex BOQ, rooftop bar and restaurant - night

Lt. Callaghan enters, lt. steele is sitting at the bar.

Lt. Steele:

Callaghan you old sonofabitch! How the hell are you? What’s all this good news? Before you answer, I’ve already booked us a table so we had better take it before someone of some rank steels it. You know how it works around here. We can be out bid at any time before we take possession.

They are seated at a table next to the edge of the terrace.

Lt. Callaghan:

We’re prime sniper targets in this spot.

Lt. Steele:

We should be safe. This place makes too much money to have it’s business interrupted. So, what’s the news.

Lt. Callaghan:

I finally got out of the Nhan Vi and ended up in the Meyerkord. No air conditioner yet but the elevator works, although sometimes one has to jump and down to engage the clutch.

Lt. Steele:

It’s great you’re closer to town. Dropping you off caused me to be on the road after curfew a couple of times. Not a good idea.  By the way, I’m going over to see my honey later, do you want to join us? She has a great looking sister.

Lt. Callaghan:

Sounds okay to me, I don’t have anything planned for the morning that would involve grey cells so let’s have a drink and something to eat, I’m starved.

By the way, have you bumped into anyone from ‘Toon Twelbe?

Lt. Steele:

I have had a few leads but all of them pointed up north, way out the range of my jeep.

Lt. callaghan:

I don’t know how we managed to stay together for so long. It must have been the Signal Corps connection and the closing of the non-combat arms OCS schools. We must have been the stragglers. That could explain why we always seemed in limbo at Dix, Jackson, McClellan, Benning, Gordon and Sill. There always seemed to be a problem of what to do with us.

Lt. Steele:

I guess we’ve been misfits all along. It didn’t really hurt us though. We had a lot of free time between schools because of the situation. (pause) I can still see Drill Instructor Walker standing on his box in the middle of the parade field at Dix asking “Where are ‘Toon Twelbe’ at?” As long as he saw 30 bodies lined up on the white, numbered platoon lines he was happy. We’re lucky that the standard Army regimentation replaced us so we could disappear for two weeks.

Lt. Callaghan:

If  Wade hadn’t screwed up and told that sergeant what we were up to we might have been able to serve enough time to pre-empt our showing up over here.

Large explosion occurs several blocks away

Probably another 122mm rocket. The tide has just come in and the NVA have perfected a simple device that floats on the water and completes the firing circuit when floats into a fixed device above it. Simple and sort of predictable.  When the rocket launches there is no one in the area so it’s useless opening fire on the launch site. 

They finish their drinks

Lt. Steele:

We can have another round here and eat or head over to my honey’s place and have more to drink there. You hungry?

lt. Callaghan:

Not really.

Lt. Steele:

Then lets go, that way we should be able to beat curfew.

Lt. Callaghan:

Beat curfew? We still have a half an hour. Where is this place?

Lt. steele:

You’ll see. Come on.

SCENE  18. ext. somewhere in Saigon - night:

Jeep, lights dimmed, slowly moved down an alley, stops

Lt. Steele:

Here we are. Jump out and help me pull that tarp over the jeep.

Lt. Callaghan suddenly in great pain holds on to the jeep

Callaghan, you okay?

Lt. callaghan:

My butt is killing me. It’s been getting worse for days. I’ve got to lie down.

Lt. Steele:

Plenty of places to lie down up here.

Lt. Callaghan follows Lt. Steele into a building.

SCENE  19. Int. yvonne’s house - night

Greeted by yvonne

Lt. Steele:

Yvonne, this is Callaghan. This is my girlfriend Yvonne. Her father is French, left for France some twenty years ago and hasn’t been heard form since. He left the house and Yvonne lives here with her mother and her stepsister. You might like Li, she is really pretty.

kisses Yvonne on the cheek

But not a pretty as Yvonne.

The air is stuffy and Lt. callaghan is not feeling well

Lt. Callaghan:

I need some air.

Lt. Steele:

There is a balcony at the end of the hallway. You can lie down on one of the cots. Li will be out in a minute to see if you need anything. I’m going to pop in here for a while and take care of some business. I’ll join you later on.

Lt. Steele and yvonne disappear into a bedroom. Lt. Callaghan wanders down the dimly lit hallway and falls asleep on a cot.

AMOROUS noise wakes him up. Lt. Steele and Yvonne on the other cot. Lt. Steele looks up.

Didn’t mean to wake you. It was just too hot inside. You don’t mind, do you?

Lt. callaghan:

No I wasn’t doing anything anyway. I’ll just drift back to sleep.

Li joins Lt. Callaghan and rubs his back

That feels wonderful.

Creaking sounds increase in intensity and the PORCH starts to tilt but no one notices. Then loud cracking. Girls scramble for the hallway. Lt Steele struggles to get his clothes on.

It’s the damn porch, it’s collapsing!

Lt. Callaghan grabs a cot as he goes over the side. Lt steele follows. they crash into several chicken coops and empty fifty-five gallon drums. Dogs bark and security lights go on. Lt Callaghan looks at Lt Steele

You okay?

Lt. Steele:

Shook up more than anything else. Lets get the hell out of here before anything else happens.

Starts to pull the tarpaulin off the jeep, sees jeep lights and freezes.

It’s the MPs. Wouldn’t you know it. Get under the tarp and don’t move.

MPs look around with a floodlight and finally leave.

Come on Callaghan, lets get the hell out of here before her mother hits us up for damages.